Monday, May 25, 2015

4/8/15



4/8/15
          I am feeling anxious this morning. I think it’s because I am going back to work. The closer my end date gets, the more relieved I feel. I am so excited for my family’s arrival! I have a hard time even writing this now. Having a stomach ache last night has kind of set me on edge as well. Regardless, I am trying to think positive, comforting thoughts. Getting all of my things ready to send home is nice too. Maybe that’s it more than anything. I like to prepare early, but I am almost too prepared because I have already begun to pack. It’s a tough reality I guess, but it will pass. It has to. In the meantime, the smartest thing I could do is eat well and save money. I have also been sure to keep in contact with my family.

          I just made some food for my lunch. Somehow I always find it comforting to make food, even if I’m not looking forward to it. It’s strange that way. I miss my mom so much. I think that sometimes cooking reminds me of her. She is such a good cook. I know she is not the biggest fan of cooking, but I always appreciate her meals. I may have written this before, but being away from home just puts into perspective how good my mom was (and is) at her job – being a mom. Cooking, cleaning, shopping, budgeting, and managing schedules can be really hard. You don’t realize it until you are expected to do it all yourself. Our lifestyles are so different, and I never really realized it until now. No wonder she tries so hard to relate to the things that I do. I used to find it annoying, but being away I find it kind of touching. My mother is such a gem.
~Bethany

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